Posts in Tiny Advice Book
Hope Helps

I hope I finish this book and I can hope that because there is a chance I finish it.

I'm writing this bit in a coffee shop on the day I go to a coffee shop and work on a single creative project for two hours.

Last week I wished I could finish this book. I could only wish because I didn't go to the coffee shop. I hadn't gone in months, but today I am here. Today I can hope because I'm making what I want possible.

You can hope for others.

Do you have a friend that you hope gets better? Do you wish there were less beings in pain or do you hope it? Those are wishes unless you do something that can make them happen.

Wishing is hopeless, but hope helps.

Slow Down

I want you to read the next paragraph aloud in a whisper or even a shout, the volume doesn’t matter — the speed does. Read it a little slow.

In this moment I am slowing down. I am taking my time. It’s not necessarily to do this right, there will always be errors, but I do it to focus on what I am doing because what I am doing is important. It is important because I am doing it with the small amount of time I have here.

How do you feel? I hope you feel a little more calm.

Now take the idea of those few sentences you read aloud and apply it to any small task you do. Try to do it at least once a day. Slow down and appreciate the small details of what you’re doing. Focus on it and not on anything that needs to be done later.

One of Those Days

You might not think it when something first goes wrong. It might take a few things for you to say it. You might not even say it. You might just think it. No matter what it’s a thought we all have.

“It’s just going to be one of those days”

It will be one of those days. One of those days you will survive. One of those days that you’ll remind yourself to be on the lookout for good things you wouldn’t notice because of a few bad things that have stolen all of your attention.

When you find yourself thinking that the day is somehow cosmically doomed for you, think about how good things will happen that day. Remember you will survive it like all those other days.

Don’t Let the Day Scare You Awake

The start of a new day is scary and like most scary things we try to avoid it. The way we most often avoid it only makes the scare worse.

Get out of bed early — an hour or more if you can.

Do not look at your notifications. Do not read email or texts or comments. The only thing to use your phone for this early is music, non-emotional and non-news podcasts, or games. Wake up easy, no need to rush.

The day isn’t here yet.

Drink something warm. Read something easy. Sit down and try not to think. Then plan how you will attack the day because it is coming and when it comes you’ll be a little more ready.

Get a Plant, Then Maybe an Animal

Depressed people often get the advice to get a pet and it seems like a perfect solution. Who couldn’t be happy with something small that loves you? It’s like a child that never grows up!

Sadly, animals need to be fed, entertained, and taken care of even when you don’t want to get out of bed.

So get a plant. Talk to it while you water it. Let it breathe in the sweet carbon dioxide of your words about your sadness and worry. It will turn those words into fresh air and beauty.

If you can keep the plant alive throughout multiple hard times then maybe you are ready to go rescue a friend from a shelter.

Write Without Stopping

Feeling like your emotions are going to burst out of wherever your particular emotions are stored?

Get a pad of paper or a cheap notebook and set a timer. The amount of time doesn’t matter, but I suggest starting small.

Three minutes is a great amount of time.

Write until the timer dings and then decide if you have more to say. If you do then keep writing. If you don’t then at least you kept writing until the timer went off.

Your Emotions Are Different Sizes

My happy emotion is small. My sad emotion is large and casts shadows on everything else. There are other emotions and they are other sizes. Sometimes one emotion changes size.

All emotions have a size.

Don’t let someone tell you that your emotions are too big or too small especially if that someone is you. Your emotions will be the size they are regardless of you trying to squeeze or stretch them.

You can’t live with a whale the same way you would live with a cat nor can you live with a dog the way you would live with an elephant. To live with your emotions you have to accept whatever size they are.

Bad Days

A day is a series of moments you will mostly forget. Some of these moments will make you feel good. Some will make you feel bad. Most of them won't register anything. Yet, we will group all of these moments together and label them bad for pity or as an excuse for everything that goes wrong.

Worse, we will label a day filled with a high number of good moments as a good day. This is an excuse to look to the future with the fear of our luck running out. It also takes credit away from your own accomplishments

Take each moment as its own and at the end of the day don't average them out to decide how your day went. Your day simply went as will your next.